Republicans need to spend the next 30 days lying their butts off to pollsters. You can’t wait to support Kamala Harris. You are thrilled, beyond ecstatic, to cast a ballot for the first Indian-American U.S. Senator to run for President of the United States as a Black woman.
You need to be able to credibly assert that it will send literal chills down your spine, historic chills, when you cast that vote for our august Border Czar, who’s never been to the border, but also has never been to Europe.
Stand firm behind the left’s newly anointed leader, who isn’t an anti-democratic choice at all, because of the extraordinary electoral strength she already demonstrated in 2020, when tens of millions of dollars and unlimited CNN slobbering managed to keep her in the primary all the way to…Iowa.
Most certainly don’t laugh at the person who calls you, and point out that a woman with a non-existent track record of accomplishment, a socially awkward persona, and the ability to deliver the kind of quality speeches in her prime that Joe Biden has only recently mastered isn’t likely to win the White House. Don’t remind them that even the New York Times, thinks Kamala Harris is even less likely than Fake Docter Jill’s ward to keep Democrats in power:
Tell them how wonderful and historic Kamala Harris is instead. Above all, do not discuss her insane cackling.
As painful as it is, every bit of this deception is mission critical for Republicans right now, because Kamala Harris is the only politician in the country who might be less electable than a dementia patient…
As the “We’re the Defenders of Democracy” crowd have proven beyond a shadow of a doubt in the last few days, they are so committed to democracy and political norms that they will happily herd Harris into a back room at the convention and defenestrate her candidacy as quickly as they did President Biden’s when they realize she has even less of a chance to win than he did.
So, my fellow, Republicans: lie like your life depends on it.
(And keep your fingers crossed that Hillary doesn’t bump Cackles off anyway on the chance someone might anoint her instead.)
Note: the opinions expressed herein are those of Sam Stone only and not his co-host Chuck Warren or Breaking Battlegrounds’ staff.